Baldur’s Gate 3 Astarion Romance Guide

Baldur’s Gate 3 features a wide variety of diverse characters across different races, backgrounds, classes, and more. You have the option to romance most of the companions in this game you recruit, including the enigmatic, mysterious, and handsome devilish Rogue Astarion.

He is one of the more complex characters to romance for many players, but I hope to simplify the situation some with this Baldur’s Gate 3 Astarion romance guide.

Astarion is the anti-hero Rogue, who does whatever he pleases. This is reflected in everything he says, does, and likes, which makes his romance quite tricky for players who err on the side of caution and all that is heroic.

But it is possible to romance him if you play the game in specific ways. Here’s what you need to do to romance or even just befriend him via this Baldur’s Gate 3 Astarion romance guide.

Bottom Line Up Front

Astarion is the Rogue member of the party and one of the first characters you can recruit in Baldur’s Gate 3. He is corrupted by the parasite in his head, much like you are, and that situation connects both of you. He holds his secrets and is a complicated person to unravel.

If you want to romance Astarion, the goal is to mainly do more selfish and artistic actions in the game. Command the weak, punish those who wrong you, and occasionally give in to your carnal desires. Do these, and you’ll be able to find out more about this fascinating and lovable party member across all three Acts of the game.

How to Recruit Astarion in Baldur’s Gate 3

baldur’s gate 3 astarion romance explained

To start, before you can even begin to think about romancing Astarion in this game, you need to recruit him to your party. You’ll want to complete the prologue Escape the Nautiloid and crash land in the Wilderness area in Act 1.

When you arrive here, the goal is to head from the beach where you land to the crashed ship and then go a little northwest from there to the coordinates of around X: 165, Y: 287 on the map. When you arrive here, a cutscene will automatically play out with Astarion.

Note there are some spoilers for this scene ahead. After chatting for a moment, Astarion will try to assassinate you. There are a couple of options you can do to stop this situation like explaining your parasite connection, persuasion, or the right conversation choices.

Regardless, don’t attack him back, or you will have to kill him and miss out on any chance to recruit him to your party, let alone romance him. After coming to an agreement with one another, you’ll join together, and you’ll have a chance to romance him from now on.

How to Romance Astarion in Baldur’s Gate 3

Now that you have Astarion in your party in Baldur’s Gate 3, it is finally time to start romancing him. What you’ll find is he is one of the trickiest party members to romance since he is very particular in his likes and dislikes. This is the most essential part of romance, too.

The idea is you have to raise your approval with the romantic target you’re after. They have to like you enough to share more about their lives with you and get to know you better. These more intimate scenes are what lead to the actual romance options and some spicier content.

Here is everything you need to know about how to romance Astarion in Baldur’s Gate 3, from his likes to what to do in his main romance scenes. Let’s get started.

What Astarion Likes

baldur’s gate 3 astarion likes

To start with, the general idea when it comes to bringing Astarion around with you is to make the decisions he likes. If you make the right decisions that he approves of, your approval with him will jump up consistently over time, and it will be a breeze to romance him. Here are some of the general ways to act in the game to get his approval:

  • Be selfish at all times: If you have a way to obtain more gold from someone or swindle them, go for it.
  • Don’t mind being a little anti-hero or even evil when necessary
  • Lie when you get the chance
  • Beat people to a pulp when you have the opportunity
  • Take control of the weak people you come across
  • Share Astarion’s love for the fine arts in whatever you do
  • Make clear choices in conversations with Astarion that agree with him and whatever he’s saying
  • Giving in to his desires regarding his illness when you have the chance

Do this consistently in everything you do and everyone you talk to, and you should have more notifications of his approval while traveling around the world.

What Astarion Dislikes

On the other hand, it is just as important to keep in mind the elements and choices that Astarion doesn’t like. If you make these choices and say things like this around him, this is a surefire way to get his disapproval, which will set you further back from befriending, let alone romancing, him:

  • Avoid the more heroic and sacrificial choices. For instance, don’t go out of your way to save someone.
  • Caring about others too much
  • Disagreeing with Astarion on anything
  • Hating or being suspicious of his particular illness (more on that in a bit)

Act 1 Camp Party Romance Explained

baldur’s gate 3 astarion romance

If you do well in Act 1, which arguably doesn’t give you a ton of time to romance Astarion, you should be treated to your first love scene with him. I should note that it is possible to still romance Astarion even if you miss out on this scene in Act 1, but you’ll want to make sure to get this scene if you can.

I suggest doing all of the side content in this Act before committing to one side or the other in the war between the goblins and the Druids in the Emerald Grove. Once you are ready and feel like you have had enough scenes with him, do the final battle, and then it is time to celebrate.

Head to your camp and speak with Astarion, who should have quite a lot to say to you. In this case, it doesn’t matter if you sided with the goblins, Tiefling refugees, or the Druids. Any of those and you still have just as much of an opportunity to romance him as the others.

In general, you want to make statements about the party, and eventually, he will suggest having a little fun later. Pick the next two options to lock in your chance to romance Astarion for the first time possibly:

  • And what’s your idea of a ‘little fun’?
  • Alright, let’s do it. I’ll see you later.

For those who only want to befriend Astarion, note that committing to this scene does not make you romance him. It is still recommended, even if you want a platonic relationship, to learn more about him. That said, if romance is your thing, here is what you should do.

Lay down after you’re done with the party, and you’ll have the option to spend some time with Astarion, which you should do. During this conversation, you’ll want to pick the following options for the optimal spicy content, which is albeit a little mellow for this point in the game:

  • You don’t have me yet.
  • And what do you want?
  • Nod to Astarion.

This will then show some juicy content for you as the game hints at some nice action, but you’ll have to wait until later on in Act 2 for the hotter stuff. Note that, again, you can still have this time with Astarion and keep it purely platonic if you want to.

Act 2 Backstory Romance Explained

baldur’s gate 3 astarion romance

During this Act, you’ll likely meet Raphael, the weird demon dude, if you haven’t already. Astarion has quite an interest in the demon, and as you get to know him more, he will want you to accept the deal that Raphael has for you and look for the Orthon to defeat.

Accepting this deal will lead to a great romance scene for you and Astarion once you return to camp for a long rest. During this campsite scene in the middle of Act 2, you’ll lie down together, and you’ll have the chance to have quite an intimate moment with the Rogue vampire.

You can pick a couple of the different options here, but the main goal is to focus on your relationship and the strong feelings the two of you have for one another. I also recommend pouring out your heart when you get the chance and letting Astarion know how you feel about him.

Here are the options I suggest for the best possible responses, in my opinion, from Astarion during this Act 2 romance scene:

  • About your undying love for me?
  • So do I. More than anything.
  • I care about you. Deeply.
  • You are worth a great deal to me, no matter what you’re going through.

This will lead to quite the eventful and fun evening for both you and Astarion as you learn about his tragic past and continue on the path to romance him for the rest of the game. Now, it is only time for the third and final main romance scene with Astarion in Act 3.

Act 3 Final Romance Scene Explained

baldur’s gate 3 astarion romance scene

The grand finale of Astarion’s romance scene in Act 3 is one you can do on your own time. After the events of Act 2, you now know the truth about his abuse and the dark past that led him to become the vampire person he is today. You’ll also know he wants to destroy his master, Cazador, as much as possible.

This leads to a companion side quest for him in Act 3, where he asks you to go with him to track down Cazador and take him out for good. While I won’t dare spoil the events of the quest itself, the outcome is what matters the most for this final romance scene and the ending you get with Astarion.

At the conclusion of the side quest, you have a final fight with Cazador in the middle of the ritual that is about to happen. The goal here is to keep the sacrifices alive while you fight Astarion’s old master and defeat him for good. This is where it gets tricky once you beat Cazador.

Astarion will now have two tough choices to make and he will start to complete the ritual for himself so he can ascend as a vampire. Your option here is to let him complete the ritual, sacrifice the people, and ascend to becoming a more incredible vampire, or stop him from doing that altogether.

I should note right now that doing either of the options will not lock you out of romancing Astarion. You can pick either one you are comfortable with and romance him. There are some key differences, though, with stopping the ritual or not.

After the fact, stopping the ritual will lead you two to a graveyard scene where there is a bit of a romance, but mostly you are there to give some closure to Astarion and spend the night with him. It isn’t quite as spicy as you might want it to be at this point in your relationship.

On the other hand, if you have him complete the ritual, you’ll get a completely different scene when you go to sleep that night at the campsite. You’ll have two options here, spoiler alert, and that is to accept all of Astarion or to have him turn you into a vampire like him.

This will lead to one of the steamiest scenes in this entire game and it will also potentially change the entire fate of your character, as you are no longer consumed by the parasites only but also your vampiric desires. When all is said and done, the best final option is to kneel before your new master and lover, which will bring your romance love story to an end.

Which Route Should You Take?

baldur’s gate 3 astarion romance

The question remains: Which path should you take with Astarion’s finale? Should you let him ascend to a more extraordinary vampire being and sacrifice all those poor innocents, or stop him and have him accept himself as he is and have your relationship end in that way?

The answer is honestly up to you. As mentioned, you get to romance him either way, and he isn’t mad at you, no matter your choice. That said, it comes down to your heart versus your body in this case. Do you go with what your heart desires with Astarion or your body?

If you stop the ritual, you’ll get a more comprehensive and heartwarming conclusion to Astarion’s storyline, which will put a nice cap on his life and story to this point. But if you let him ascend, this is more of the darker route in a way, and it is all about satisfying your most intimate desires.

Personally, I would go with the former since you get to see Astarion have a more emotional conclusion to his storyline, whereas the other one only continues the cycle. However, if you want to be a vampire and learn the Vampire Bite move, this is the only way to do it in the entire game, so it might be worth considering for that alone.


Question: What is the Best Romance in Baldur’s Gate 3?

Answer: The best romance in Baldur’s Gate 3 is going to be subjective to each player. That said, from my personal experience in the game so far, the three romances that impressed me the most are Gale, Shadowheart, and the star of this guide, Astarion. Astarion, in particular, takes much longer than the other two for some players to unlock.

Question: Is Astarion Romanceable in BG3?

Answer: Yes, Astarion is romanceable in BG3. If you have to ask this question, it is most likely because you are struggling to gain his approval. You might have to dismiss some of your kinder companions and start embracing the dark side to get Astarion on your romantic side.

Question: Can You Romance Shadowheart in Baldur’s Gate 3?

Answer: Yes, you can romance Shadowheart in Baldur’s Gate 3. She is a pretty unique companion in that she prefers some heroic actions at times, despite her background, but will also like it when you approve of her goddess Shar and all of that. She is a tough one to romance, like Astarion, but my personal favorite.

What is the Best Armor to Use for Astarion?

Astarion is one of the most impressive and mysterious party members you can meet in Baldur’s Gate 3. He is not only a handsome guy with a charming personality, but he has one of the more heartbreaking and surprising backstories you can find in the already emotional game.

Romancing Astarion is one of the real treats of this game, especially since it can be a seriously slow burn for some players, depending on the actions and choices they make. But if you are able to get close to Astarion, you’ll find it is also one of the most rewarding parts of the experience.

But to get close enough to romance Astarion, you’ll likely need him in your party a lot. This means ensuring he has the best armor in Baldur’s Gate 3 that is suited for his Rogue class. This way, he can stay alive long enough in the game to always stick by your side.

Continue reading:

Baldur’s Gate 3 Romance Guide | A Guide to Each Possible Romance

Baldur’s Gate 3 Best Feats: Martial Adept, Tough, and More

Baldur’s Gate 3 Necromancy of Thay Guide: How to Open the Necromancy of Thay Book

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